In Three Easy Steps!!
“We seem to have a great ability to remember our failures and our stupidities and then with these memories weave complex stories about what we can and cannot do.
Once we’ve lived with these for long enough, we are convinced beyond a doubt that they are true – no question about it. We believe every bit of negative garbage our mind recounts for us — regardless of the amount of proof we have that argues against it.”
Imagine that I’m there beside you and just told you that “Anything is Possible for YOU.” How do you react? Do you say, “Wow – great news, Jinny! I’ve been waiting for someone to tell me that my whole life!”
That would be great, but if that isn’t your reaction, welcome to the human race!
Do You Tend To Beat Yourself Up?
We are so hard on ourselves, filled with negative beliefs, assumptions, thoughts, feelings and paradigms about what’s wrong with us or how we’re a victim of circumstances.
And most of the time we’re unaware how the mindless self-talk is guiding – and limiting — everything we do. In 30 years of coaching thousands of people, I’ve never met anyone without a Monkey Mind – that little voice that runs a constant commentary on what’s wrong with us and why we can’t get what we want and need in life.
So, while the voice will always be there, you can keep it from controlling your life and the results you achieve!
The Good News…
The good news is that shifting limiting beliefs is absolutely possible, and you can do it. It’s going to take some work to discover what your strongest ones are, but for a long time we have been using an 3-step exercise that works to generate a personal transformation for those who use it.
How what you think and say to yourself can affect the results you produce. How your feelings attract the results you get in your life. What’s required is to learn to manage your thoughts and feelings.
I bet this sounds as if you’re meant to be the cop, walking the beat and shoving your thoughts and feelings around, forcing them to follow the law. Well, it’s a lot like that actually.
You need to be the big tough guy or gal, the one in charge. This is your show and you’re not going to let those tired old habitual ways of thinking negatively about yourself get the upper hand. You simply can’t afford to. Or they’ll take you straight down the path of failure and disappointment.
Why You Have To Immediately Stop Beating Yourself Up
Your thoughts and feelings lead you directly to the results you produce in your life. Exactly and precisely. It’s called the Law of Attraction.
What you put out comes back – in a frighteningly quick and exact fashion. Energy out matches energy in. Thoughts out match results in. Feelings create your life.
Let’s take one thought, “I’m afraid I won’t have enough money to pay my bills this month:” this thought creates feelings – anxiety, fear and a sense of doom. With those kinds of thoughts and feelings in charge, I can guarantee you won’t be able to pay your bills.
Something will happen.
You have created that future for yourself. It’s not just my good idea – it’s a proven fact of life.
You Are Already Doing This….
Energy matches energy in this world. It’s a law and I’m sure you’ve heard about it before – it’s stated in many ways.
• Like attracts like!
• What you focus on is what you get!
• What goes round, comes round!
• As ye sow, so shall ye reap!
You are an extremely powerful person, whether you have figured this out or not. And you are always using your power – believe me.
It’s just that you’re either using it in positive or negative ways – either you’re predicting success or you’re predicting failure.
Whatever you predict is what you’ll get because that’s where you’ve focused your power. Focus your power on making more money and you’ll make more money. Focus your energy on your fear that you’re not going to make it – your business is going to fail – and you’ll fail to achieve your dream. It’s automatic, it works and is very real.
It’s the moment in your life when you shift from being the victim to being the master of your fate. You’ve identified the most limiting paradigm or assumption – your key limiting thought and feeling — the big one you’ve made about yourself and your chances of success and you’ve written a new paradigm that describes your future – your new reality.
Now the job is to make sure that you manage your thoughts and feelings in such a way that this new state can emerge.
Our minds are incredible devices that store information, reason, remember and dream. But they can also be devious – cataloguing negative experiences in a way that we lose confidence in ourselves and our ability to produce results.
We seem to have a great ability to remember our failures and our stupidities and then with these memories weave complex stories about what we can and cannot do.
Once we’ve lived with these for long enough, we are convinced beyond a doubt that they are true – no question about it. We believe every bit of negative garbage our mind recounts for us — regardless of the amount of proof we have that argues against it.
And it gets worse. Now that we’re living in this mental and emotional environment of low confidence and fear of failure, we are programmed to avoid taking risks.
Is Your Motto “Anything For The Comfortable Life?”
Now, don’t get me wrong, I know you don’t go around consciously plotting and scheming to keep yourself comfortable and making elaborate schemes to avoid risk and failure. But if you think about how you behave, you might be able to detect that old program at work.
How else do you account for the fact that you (like most of us) avoid doing the things that matter most while spending your time doing things that bring far less reward and fulfillment? What other explanation are there for the fact that you don’t pick up the phone and take the step that could bring you the result you’re looking for? Yes, it’s scary. But the only thing that makes it scary is the fear of failure. “As long as I don’t pick up the phone, I haven’t failed yet”.
And the final bit of bad news about the negative capacity of your mind is that you, like all of us, want above all to be right. Even about the dumbest things! It’s so perverse. “See, I knew he’d say NO!” OR “Well – didn’t get the raise. What did you expect?” OR “I knew I couldn’t stick to this exercise routine with all the challenges in my life!! What did I tell you?”
This insidious little game is so costly – again, we have to wake up to how we’re limiting ourselves and rise above these old habits.
There are 3 steps to creating this moment of change and transformation, and Habib and Jackie asked me to outline this process after a successful coaching session I had with them.
The coaching work I do can directly build upon their area of focus at PEERtrainer.
STEP 1 How do I limit myself?
Write a list of ways in which you limit yourself by things you do,
things you fail to do and ways you behave that don’t bring the results you want. You’re answering the question, How do I limit myself?
STEP 2 How do I explain my limitations?
Here you discover how you explain these behaviors – called your limiting beliefs. For example, imagine that one of yourlimitations is that you stay up too late at night, then don’t sleep well, then don’t wake up refreshed. What do you say to yourself to explain this behavior? Perhaps something like it’s the only time I have to myself, I’m a night person, I can’t get it all done unless I stay up late, I’m not very efficient… Given that the result you want is to feel healthy and well rested, doing a great job every day as a result, what chance to you have to achieve that result, given these limiting beliefs.
STEP 3 How can I stop limiting myself?
Create a new positive belief or paradigm – one that describes the new reality for you – the way YOU want it to be. I’m achieving amazing results everywhere I go! Or I make the right choices! These new beliefs guide you to be the person you want to be – and give you a place to shift your focus when the Monkey Mind
In upcoming articles I’ll give you detailed instructions about taking each one of these steps and – most importantly – share with you the secrets of how to keep your transformation alive….
Lets Get Started: Click Here To Start Step 1
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| Digg | Facebook | DeliciousJinny Ditzler has been a corporate and personal development coach for 30 years and is the creator of “Best Year Yet Online” Best Year Yet is a proven and guaranteed system that teaches you the secret to successful goal setting. When you set the right goals, and put a system around them that guarantees you follow through- your results will follow! Click here to learn more about the Best Year Yet Online System.